As I was getting my morning cup of coffee, the clerk said, "Happy Holidays!" in a cheerful and bright manner than made me smile. Immediately, the grinch next to me ruined the mood. "Why is there such a war on Christmas? Why can't people use the correct name for the day?" And with a humph, he turned to leave , waving us off, "Have a nice day."
But... but... but... it was Wednesday! A day that is named after the Anglo-Saxon god Woden, the equivalent of the Scandinavian Odin. Jesus was a nice guy who would take pleasure in anyone spreading happiness, but Odin was a vengeful god. The War on Wednesday is a serious attack on European culture and we should protest loudly.
Good Wednesday, ladies and gentlemen.